Relationship Advice

A Cheesy Sunday Morning

Good morning all you lovely people. I'm feeling particularly loving this morning and thought I would share with you some relationship advice. I have a pretty good thing going with Jordon and we work really well together, so I can give you insight into why WE work.

Disney 2013

 Our Story

Jordon and I went to high school together. He was a grade higher than I was. The first time I saw him was at our touch of class dance when I was in grade ten, but being as he was the cool older guy, we never talked. We had a ton of mutual friends, so it wasn't hard for me to creep him on facebook and add him. We still never talked. Many years later, I had just gotten out of a brutal relationship and apparently Jordon was going through the same thing. I make one of those attention seeking facebook status (that I judge everyone else for doing, whoops) that said something like "could this day get any worse?" Jordon sent me a message saying things could always be worse, and things will get better. It was just the perfect pick me up. So we started talking and found out we both work for ATCO so I asked him to lunch. He didn't work in the same building though, but took my number as he was moving downtown. I also informed him of my IKEA furniture expertise (which I screwed up on). He asked me to come help me get furniture and build it and the rest is history.

Why We Work:

1. He's my best friend : I've noticed a lot of people having issues dealing with the opposite sex best friend. I feel that if you're with the right person, they should be your best friend. This is really important for long term serious relationships. As your partner, they should be the one you're calling first when something important happens, and the one you can cry and laugh with. Now I get it, sometimes you need an outside opinion and that's fine. But if you have a male (or female, for you men) bestfriend that is being put before your relationship, you're putting yourself in situations that one day can cause a huge blowup. If they opposite best friend thing works for you, then I tip my hat, but trust me when I say it's awesome to have the all in one package.

2. Trust : now we've all heard this. Trust is a major necessity in a relationship. But here's the thing: sometimes we feel uncertain and self-conscious from PAST relationships (this definitely applied to me). I know you shouldn't put stuff that has happened in the past on your current relationship, but if you were with someone unhealthy for a long time (I was in a very unhealthy relationship for 2 1/2 years) those thing stick with you. You can get over it, but it takes time. I communicated this to Jordon right from the get go and he understood. During the unhealthy relationship, the ex would have girls texting him and sending him pictures all the time, so of course I would constantly check his phone. When I started dating Jordon, it was still in the back of my mind, but if I asked to see his phone (usually for the time or something) he handed it over. He had nothing to hide from me and now I trust him 100%. You have to build trust with someone, it's not just there. If either partner is having a problem supporting their partner in building that trust, you really need to have a talk.

3. Communicate: EVERYTHING! Jordon knows about everything in my past, I know his. We know where we've come from, we know our thoughts for the future, we know when the other is getting ansy and needs to be left alone. I had to work on my communication A LOT (doesn't every woman?) If you're feeling mad, tell him. If you're feeling sad, tell him. If you're feeling overwhelmed with joy, TELL HIM. Don't expect him to know everything that's going through your head. Also for men, tell your lady how you're feeling once in a while. 

4. Laugh, as much as you can: there has been times where Jordon and I have spent an hour just goofing off and I always end up on the floor clutching my stomach. Have fun, go on adventures like a two week road trip (for pointers about a road trip click here ), try something new (we're attempting jogging this spring and just enjoy life!

Well as I said, I'm feeling loving so I'm off to make Jordon some coffee and breakfast.

-Vanessa xo